There Is A Parallel Dimension
There is a parallel dimension – several of them, actually, including VS13 — where Special Agents Fox Mulder and Dana Scully continue to investigate the uncanny and the paranormal without the primal lifeforce known as Chris Carter. In this fanfic dimension, no television networks exist as a barrier to their investigations or – as we so often see, their romantic or sexual appetites.
In fairness, the Mighty Carter breached the network barrier at least once: In Unusual Suspects, our Gunmen faced off against Detective John Munch, a member in good standing with the Baltimore P.D. At the time, Munch was in the employ of NBC, as part of the ensemble cast of the series Homicide: Life on the Streets. Munch, played by Richard Belzer, also is TV’s King of the Crossover, having crossed swords with the original Law and Order cops before moving on to Law and Order: Special Victims Unit and popping in other shows from time to time like Sam Beckett Quantum Leaping between decades.
On another occasion, Carter was forced to sneak in the back door of the barrier: CBS refused his request to send Mulder and Scully on a crossover assignment in Rome, Wis. — home of Picket Fences, David E. Kelley’s pre-Ally McBeal, pre-Boston Legal series about law enforcement and bizarre happenings in a small town setting. Not to be daunted, Carter and Kelley slipped one in on the network suits: While investigating a curious case of local cows impregnated with human embryos (Mulder woulda milked that one), Rome’s Sheriff Jimmy Brock makes reference to an equally curious case in nearby Delta Glen and the even curiouser FBI agent who investigated it. Sheriff Brock (Tom Skerritt) refers, of course, to the conspiratorially cultish case related in Red Museum.
And, of course, Carter penetrated the barrier between reality programming and drama
in X-Cops and the veil between Mulder and Scully’s three-dimensional universe and the
animated world in an otherworldly episode of The Simpsons (anyone who doesn’t wet themselves silly during Homer’s drunken come-on to Cartoon Scully needs the defibrillator paddles).
Now, imagine a post-Je Souhaite world without network borders, where Scully can cross Jordan or swap forensic observations with Gil Grissom and his CSI crew and where Mulder can trade clues with Lt. Columbo (yes, he’s still on the payroll, too) or drop into the E.R. for a quick CAT scan of his fevered brain. You have crossed over into The Crossover Zone, where tonight:
•Trailer court Samaritan Earl Hickey (My Name is Earl) tries to do a favor for a snack-lovin’ alien despite a swarm of UFO buffs, a greedy ex-wife out for tabloid fame, and a persistent chatterbox named Fox Mulder. Lied to the Federal Government About UFO Abduction by Elf X
•Psychic Arizona housewife Allison Dubois (Medium) helps our agents investigate a serial killer who may be linked to Mulder and Scully’s past. The Mindhunter by Vickie Moseley
• Dr. Scully consults with the brilliantly Sherlockian, acidly antisocial Dr. Gregory House (House) on case involving Hurricane Katrina, a gray-skinned lady with a strange and dangerous illness, and, possibly, a Cajun werewolf. God and Bad Planning by Martin Ross
•The gang from Scrubs gets involved in a case rife with Muldertorture, Scullytorture, and the tortured fantasies Agent Scully inspires in young Dr. J.D. My Dream of Scully with the Bright Red Hair by Vickie Moseley.
So pop open a bag of Doritos, sit back, turn off the tube, and enjoy this week’s prime-time lineup on The VS.
AUTHOR: Elf X
CATEGORY: Crossover — My Name is Earl/XF, humor
DISCLAIMER: The X-Files and My Name of Earl belong to other folks – I’m just gonna borrow ‘em for a while.
SUMMARY: Earl Hickey’s gotta get his karma right, with the help of a couple of guardian agents.
AUTHOR: Vickie Moseley ; email@example.com
CATEGORY: crossover, X
RATING: good for all
DISCLAIMER: (Crossovers make these things so complicated). Thanks to Kelsey Grammar,
also known as Dr. Frasier Crane for Alison Dubois and her family and co-workers. Thanks to Chris Carter for Mulder and Scully and seven wonderful years plus some episodes later. Thanks to me for putting them all together, stirring gently for five minutes and ‘voila’!
No copyright infringement intended in any case.
SUMMARY: Medium/The X-Files crossover. The Phoenix area District Attorney’s resident psychic, Alison Dubois, is about to make the acquaintance of the FBI’s top profiler and his
enigmatic partner. None of them will ever be the same.
AUTHOR: Martin Ross
CATEGORY: Crossover casefile
RATING: R for language
DISCLAIMER: Mulder and Scully are the creation of Chris Carter, Greg House the brainchild
of Paul Attanasio, Bryan Singer, David Shore, and Katie Jacobs.
SUMMARY: When a serial killer is loose and a curiously ill Katrina survivor seems to be involved, Mulder and Scully meet a formidable adversary — Dr. Gregory House.
AUTHOR: Vickie Moseley ; firstname.lastname@example.org
SUMMARY: Dr. JD Dorian of Sacred Heart Hospital comes face to face with his latest
fantasy girl — Special Agent Dana Scully. Too bad she had to bring her partner with her.
CATEGORY: Crossover, MT, SA H
RATING: Tuesday night NBC prime time
DISCLAIMER: Zach Braff and Bill Lawrence are responsible for everything Sacred Heart related. Chris Carter and his many minions are responsible for all things X Files. I just shook ’em all up in a big zip-lock bag.